This depreciating feeling...

Somehow, there's this depressing, confusing feel to the whole thing... There's something not right... The complexity for the simplest of thoughts... My mind has been shaken, tampered...

This vulnerability, this fragility... completely dependant on faith and trust of the highest and purest delicacy. How much could one tolerate with the possible breach of faith, trust, and the comfortless feeling thrown at him every now and then. It's so difficult to handle these tense and complicated situations. Complicated because you don't know why it has to be like that. Tense because it hurts you deeply but you're supposed to handle it with a great amount of caution.

Feelings and emotions are involved and that is the worst thing. You feel like walking out so much, but you can't. Because of the emotional attachment and bond built with such strength. Those invisible strings attached lively through each and every nerve and vein. It hurts you so much but at the same time, you can only choose to accept it. Many times I asked myself, why does it has to be like that? Why do people still continue to hurt you when they know exactly the stuff they're doing would? Why am I always in such a situation? Is this god's prank or something? Or am I reeling myself into my own grave? It's bleeding, my tender, brittle heart. My mind, in a drunken stupor. My usual basic instincts lost themselves. Me? Badly disoriented in this thick dark menacing mist. These looming elusive signs - an alarm of personal crisis.

I'm losing myself...

Acknowledgement: Graphic was extracted from http://users.antrasite.be/ppoisse/Documents/Images/peinture.